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Momosum and the Dragoona by Jane Snookes

Can the evil Momosum get his very own dragon? This story is not for the squeamish...


“Yes,” Momosum slammed down the phone. Finally, he’d located the egg. It had taken all his savings and numerous threats, but now it would be his. After all, to be taken seriously, every evil genius must have their own dragon.

“Get out of my way, Cat. I’m going to fetch my new pet” Momosum kicked at the ball of fluff. It leapt in the air, narrowly avoiding contact, and managed to viciously scratch exposed flesh.

“Ow, you beast.” He laughed and cracked his knuckles. “You may be vicious, but nothing will be as powerful as my Dragoona.”

Momosum transferred control of his computer’s malicious software to his phone while shoving pants, an axe, a stun-gun and his toothbrush into a bag and was ready to leave within minutes. Slamming the front door, he rushed to start his battered old car. Nothing. Jumping out he swore as he gave the tyres a good kicking before hoping back in. After the third attempt the engine lethargically fired. Flooring the pedal, he limped out of his drive only just avoiding Mrs Goldfinch and her doddery dog as they crossed in slow-motion.

“Idiots!” He screamed.

Two hundred miles later he abandoned the steaming vehicle in the entrance to Heathrow’s Terminal 5. Marching through the airport and barging everyone out of his way, he headed towards security relaxing his face into an innocent smile.

‘I’m so clever’ he cackled internally, using his evil software to bypass the safety systems and subsequently strode towards his flight with the axe and stun gun still in his bag.

The flight felt like an eternity such was Momosum’s excitement. Extended delays did not help his temper. He made sure at least one passenger would never fly again after cracking her head against the window so hard the sound of her nose breaking made another holidaymaker sick. Bad turbulence is terrible, Momosum shrugged when accusing eyes turned his way.

On landing, he made sure he was first to embark and sweated in the intense heat.

“You’re late,” he moaned at his guide, glaring at the rusty old car sat waiting for them. “I said I wanted luxury transport.” The guide rubbed his fingers together hinting for more cash.

“There is no more money” he fumed, sliding onto the hard seat. The guide shrugged.

They drove solidly for three days with the guide chattering utter rubbish. Momosum uncomfortably shifted in his seat but nothing could alleviate the aches. Up into the hills they went. When the roads ended, they hiked. The guide carrying on talking. For eight days they pushed through monsoons and scorching heat, across lush, green countryside, up steep hills and then into rocky terrain.

Time after time, Momosum only just managed to hold back from tossing the guide off a cliff, so persistently friendly was the old man. In the end he could no longer control himself. The guide screamed as he fell the 1000 feet into the rocky ravine.

Momosum carried on alone until he stumbled upon a mangy dog wandering amongst the caves. He kindly fed it old bones they found along the way and it loyally followed him across the rough terrain. Finally, after ten empty nests and more blisters than in a yard of bubble wrap, they arrived at the edge of an immense cave.

For the first time, the dog seemed reluctant to enter. A shadow lurked. Momosum smile.

Wafting a smelly old bone under its nose, Momosum lured the dog to the entrance before throwing the bone to the edge of the darkness. Hunger overrode its fear and the dog greedily followed.

A blast of fire flew out. The dog howled. Crunch. It was gone.

Momosum could smell victory. His prize was finally within reach.

He paced as he waited for the enormous dragon to fall asleep then crept into the dark dank cave; axe and stun-gun in hand. So silent were his feet and quick were his reflexes the mother Dragoona was rendered immobile before she even knew he was there. Laughing, despite the effort, Momosum hacked off her head. She was dead long before the sound echoed back at him.

As Momosum wiped the blood off his axe he assessed how to reach the egg. Flexing his weedy muscles, it took all his effort, and a lot of puffing to pull her tail to one side. He stood back gazing in awe at the giant glowing egg, resting comfortably on its nest of bones.

“What did you have to go and kill her for?” a deep voice echoed from behind.

Momosum’s heart hit the top of his mouth.

“Who’s that? Come on, show yourself,” he spun round, axe in hand.

The figure was silhouetted against the outside light. A round faced, pale individual stepped forward, dressed head to toe in dark grey.

“Grafite? Is that you?” Momosum sighed and flapped his hand dismissively, dropping the axe to his side. “What’s with that look? Never mind, off you go now, back to mummy; nothing to see here.”

“Oh, I don’t think so,” Grafite said.

“Run along, I’ve got work to do.”

“Thank you for finding it for us. It’s ours now. You run along.”

“Don’t push it. I’m playing with the big boys now. Not something you’d understand.” Momosum cackled.

Grafite smiled.

“Hold on,” a thought struck Momosum, “How did you know I was looking for the egg?”

“You’re with the big boys now. You work it out.”

Momosum reached for his phone and pressed the screen furiously.

“You’ve been tracking me,” he said.

“It seems your impenetrable wall wasn’t so impenetrable after all.”

“I don’t believe it,” Momosum’s shout echoed through the cave.

The huge egg wobbled and a large crack appeared in the glittery purple shell. Both men turned to look.

Gently placing his phone back in his pocket, Momosum again took up the axe. Grafite was mesmerised by the hatching egg oblivious to Momosum moving closer.

Thwap! With a sickening blow Momosum cracked Grafite’s head open. He fell silently to the floor.

Popping the axe away, Momosum turned back to the egg, rubbing his hands together. After all he’d been through, it would soon be his. He could feel the power; smell the victory.

His excitement grew as the egg spun, flipped and wrestled with itself then burst open releasing the fearsome baby Dragoona. She stretched up to her full height, dwarfing Momosum.

“My goddess," he cried, arms outstretched, "Come to me. You are mine!"

The Dragoona peered down at him and tilted her head. Her eyes glistened. Her belly rumbled.

Momosum smiled triumphantly.

In one gulp she swallowed him whole.





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